A Day On The Farm

As I have no lessons on Friday, I decided to go with Evan to go and buy some hay bales for the animals that they keep at his mum's house. Although The fact that the sheep had just had their first two lambs of the year was really the main reason to go if I'm being honest.   

(Left) Bucky Doesn't Like The Snow (Right) "Oh Look, Another Human"

Bucky Had A Heavy Night

When Not Led In The Barn, You'll
Find Major Stood In The Sun Eating
The Same Patch Of Grass

Ever Seen The Film 'Black Sheep'?

When we arrived, Evan's cat, Bucky was sunbathing on the porch to greet us. This cat is the laziest cat that I've ever met, you can do anything to this cat and he just takes it. Ever since he was a kitten, Evan has thrown him up in the air and catches him whenever he sees him. This affection is known as 'Upsy Daisy' and Bucky doesn't fight, doesn't struggle, he doesn't even panic whilst in mid air. Snowballs have been thrown at him, only for his reaction to be sniffing the snow. Pillows have been thrown at his sleeping body only for him to stretch as a response, followed by going back to sleep. He also is the only cat I know who comes when you call his name. A few years ago Evan's mum ran over the poor little guy when parking her car. As with my cat, Bucky recognises his owners car and thinks that it won't hurt him and runs underneath before the car has stopped. On this particular day Evan's mum hit Bucky and broke his ribs. Pushing them roughly back into place, Bucky then lay in a cardboard box for a few days before venturing out again. He seems OK and
the vet didn't even say anything the next time he had to go. The day after the blizzard, Evan decided to have some fun with poor Bucky (see video) although revenge was had when he went straight up the stairs and onto Evan's bed without even drying himself off. Touche, Bucky. Touche.

The sheep were demanding food and water as the trough had frozen but we left them for the time being and went into the stable to see the new arrivals, a little white one and a little black one. As we went in, Major the horse was led outside the pen holding the sheep looking inside. Major is in his 40's and doesn't have many of his teeth left, his activities range from sitting in the stable and standing in the sun eating the same patch of grass. Apparently during the summer, the grass grows really long and yet he eats from the same small patch as the lush grass around him remains uneaten. Old men are renowned for not liking change.

I Want A Pet Lamb

The little white lamb has got to the age where he ventures a little away from mother, but then when he realised that he's not next to her he runs back. The little black one is younger and sticks by his mother's side permanently. He hasn't even learnt to clean his own arse as sheep mess clung to his legs and tail. The white lamb's mother was very protective and circled me, bleeting as I held the little guy. Unfortunately the two little lambs (a third is on the way) aren't going to make it to adulthood and will be eaten by Evan and his family before the end of the year.

The Yorkshire Side Of Me Came Out To Play

When we returned to Central, we thought that it would be rude not to stop by at Hooters for some wings. Here we learnt that on a Thursday they have all you can eat boneless wings from 6pm until closing. It seems that there may be an evening of eating and drinking whilst watching one of the numerous T.V's on the walls. It would be rude not to.

When I get home I may put into process applications for Hooters Restaurants to be built all over England. When I looked up if we already had one I found that we have a restaurant in Nottingham with plans to build one in Bristol. I also found a very funny article from the FeMail section of the Daily Mail. Does anyone else sense a little bit of jealousy from Liz Jones?

A Hooters In The Centre Of Clitheroe Would Be
Wonderful

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1318258/Hooters--offensive-bar-Britain-Asks-Liz-Jones.html

Fort Lauderdale & Last Goodbyes

Me & The Number 1 Swede On The Way To Cape Cod
In September.

With only a couple of days left until we have to depart the luxury of Florida and home cooked meals, Jon and I took a trip down the coast to Fort Lauderdale. Not only is it a wonderful place to visit, but we had some unfinished business to take care of. Erik was staying there and unless we popped down to see him, we wouldn't get a chance to say goodbye before he went back to Sweden.  The funny thing is that Ice Hockey is big in Sweden and Erik wanted to see an NHL game whilst here, but the season has been in lockout since he arrived. It has just been announced that those in charge have come to an agreement with the teams so that it will start again this month, just as Erik's going home. 

Despite being a great guy, Erik is a pain in the backside when it comes to texting. His English is perfect, written and spoken, yet for some strange reason this all seems to go down the drain once on his phone. I'm not sure if it is because he forgets to change the auto correct from Swedish to English, or if he does it to annoy me, but it proves problematic; especially when you're trying to arrange plans. 

They Are Possible To Miss - Trust Me.

After long texts the previous night we got an address out of him and waited outside the hotel. It turns out that the address he gave us wasn't his address. The funny thing was that when we said we were outside, he said that he couldn't see us. No bloody wonder when you deliberately gave us the wrong address so we would be nearer the beach. Anyway, he told us to walk along the sea front until we came to two big plastic fish; my turn to be stupid now. We walked for a long time before deciding to get something to eat, I told him that I couldn't find the fish and that we were in such a restaurant. When he arrived he pointed out the fish right outside the window I was sat next to. 

It turns out that he has had a mixed three weeks in Florida. Having spent most of his time on the west coast of the state, the weather wasn't as good as what we have had here in West Palm. He was happy to see his girlfriend, albeit for a short time before she boarded a cruise with her parents (one he was meant to go on but his visa wouldn't allow him back in the country). He then diagnosed himself with a strain of Man-flu and prescribed himself time in bed.

Erik & I Rafting In Massachusetts 

Travelling around with Hongi, Stef, and another German in a rented car he feared for his life whenever Stef got behind the wheel. I've never traveled with her so can't personally comment, but it became a joke once she smashed into the back of a car when checking her blind spot for far too long. 

After we ate we spent some time on the beach. The beaches here are lovely yet we found ourselves in the gay part of the beach; great choice there Erik. Once the sun began to set we did a little pub crawl and found out that Fort Lauderdale would be a great place to have stayed. Lots of pubs and clubs, beautiful beaches, great atmosphere; similar to Miami but with less money. 

For Some Reason, Beaches In America Aren't Crowded Like
Any Other I've Been To.

We went to Hooters for tea but felt short changed when we were stuck behind a pillar blocking our view, and then served by a guy. Not happy. At 8.30, Jon and I said our goodbyes to Erik promising to meet up again in the future, whether it be in England, Sweden, or mainland Europe.

The problem that now faced, Jon and I was that there is no public transport to speak of to get us back to West Palm, the pubs were starting to get lively, and there were sun loungers on the beach. Trying our hardest to avoid the pubs we walked up and down the strip before being told of a deal '$10 to drink as much draft beer as you want from 9pm-4am' Now to us this sounded like a scam so we walked on, but then we came across another promoter selling the same deal. We couldn't resist the idea of this twice in a short space of time so we went and had a look finding out that it was in fact a real deal, not a scam. 

Some Memories Are Best Left Forgotten.

We walked in and it was a little dead but we didn't mind, we thought it would pick up. The problem was it didn't. There was meant to be a Beer Pong Tournament starting at 9pm but the owner wanted 20 teams, and so waited for the magic number. It never came, in fact people got annoyed waiting and left leaving me, Jon, and a couple of other lads as the only people in this massive pub/club. That was when the live entertainment came on, a rapper and a DJ who claimed that they don't care if they play in front of 2 or 200 people as this time next year they'll be famous. After hearing them, I can't say I have the same faith in them as they had in themselves. Even the toilet attendant left early, although he was asleep earlier on in the night anyway.

Looking Studious Sat On The Steps
At Harvard

After putting in a fair enough shift and carrying each other out of the pub we decided it be best to try and get a taxi home. Now, I don't know if I missed something because the taxi man was Haitian and I couldn't understand a word he said, but I said if he would do it for $80 off the clock to which he agreed; or so it seemed. When we set off I noticed the clock was on but thought nothing of it, I'm drunk and can't understand what he's saying anyway. When we finally arrived he charged us $98, now I fail to see how $80 off the clock became $98 on it? Jon said he cut a decent chunk off what it should have cost and I was too tired and lazy to argue. If the taxi drivers here are like home, you're never going to win.

For our final trip out in Florida it was good to see Erik and I wish him all the best back home in Sweden. CCSU just won't be the same without people thinking we're brothers, related, or simply getting the two of us mixed up. All the best mate. 

The Big E

Every September in Massachusetts, an all American carnival comes to town. Now compared to the fair we get back in Clitheroe, this was more like a day at Blackpool Pleasure Beach, just with more food. A lot more food.

Rather than going with the University on the tiny little yellow school bus, Jon and Connor volunteered to drive Erik, Hongi, Stefanie, Sofia (Spanish), Cristina (Spanish), Evan (USA), and myself to this weird and wonderful land. The Big E seems to be a mix of pretty much everything, with companies setting up stalls to advertise their products such as whirlpools, furniture, pots and pans, art etc. As well as pubs, burger vans, rides, games, and history. It is pretty much everything thrown together into one giant pot and stirred up. I found some American Cider called Harpoon and began to sample that, despite the huge price tag, yet found novelty in the fact that it was my first drink here served in a pint glass, albeit advertised in ounces. 

Erik goes to town with the Hammer whilst I sneak
past to stand out of the way.

The food stalls reminded me very much of going to Old Trafford. I never laughed as hard in my life as when I last went to watch Blackburn Rovers against Manchester United. I must have heard every accent except Mancunian  Everyone was armed to the teeth with Man Utd shopping bags, and there was an entire street full of these American style burger vans. Just replace the US flags with Irish tri-colours. 

This is also where we met the good old stereotypical American. At the gate you could rent mobility scooters, the only difference here is that they aren't exactly aimed at the elderly. Everywhere you looked there was a massive American sat on one of these eating a dustbin lid full of nachos, crisps, chips, all covered in melted cheese. It was almost as if you paid for the tray and you could fill it as much as you want, as long as it stayed on the plate. I've never seen food piled so high. Erik and I wanted to take our picture with one of them, but we chickened out. 

Erik & I beat up Hongi

After Jon, Stefanie, and Sofia went on a couple of rides, Erik, Jon, and I competed in the hammer game. I don't know what else to call it, but it's that game where you get a big hammer, smack the base and try to hit the bell at the top. Lets just say, that I didn't exactly excel at this particular game, getting about a quarter up the pole. Erik won getting about two thirds of the way up, whilst Jon just beat myself. We did however win inflatable Boston Red Sox hammers. Oh the fun I had hitting people on the head. 

Now there is a very happy chappy

Whilst there I also ran into a furniture company showing off their wares. I must admit that I got quite excited and took a look around inspecting the work with a trained eye. I must admit that it wasn't that bad at a cheap price, although I could tell where corners had been cut. Still, for the price, it was bloody good stuff. I thought that my geekiness was at an all time high, but then I came across an old fashioned Cabinet Maker surrounded by old fashioned tools. I was like a kid in a sweet shop. I was happy as Larry looking at all the tools and once we got talking, I could have stayed there all day. Also, you could tell that he was a master craftsman because he had half a finger missing. Technically, until I lose a digit, I'm still an apprentice. 

You can take the geek out of the workshop, but never the workshop out of the geek

On the way home we decided to have tea at Hooters. Now personally, I thought that this would be more of a pub for lads to watch sport and ogle the barstaff. How surprised I was to find families eating with their children in more of a restaurant atmosphere. There was a lad who had just turned 16 who was surrounded by the staff as they sung Happy Birthday and covered him in 'I Love Hooters' stickers. I think I know where I'm going for my 25th. I did like how there were televisions everywhere playing sport, although I was surprised at how little of the Ryder Cup was shown. Only one TV in the corner showed it, and that kept flicking over to something else, whilst the others were all devoted to American Football. USA were winning at the time too. No-one has seemed to bat an eyelid, whilst when I go on Facebook, everyone back home is over the moon, even those who don't follow golf. Odd.

Erik & I with the Hooters Staff

This weekend Erik, Stefanie, Hongi, and myself are going to Washington DC for 3 days. We've checked the weather and once again, it looks like I'm topping up on the sunburn. 

P.S - Finally Steve Kean has done the honourable thing and walked, although I'm now worried as to who Venkys will get as a replacement.