Texas - The Missing Chapter

There was one major incident that was hidden from the archives during Mine and Evan's trip to Texas. An incident that was kept between those involved for the sake of ease, to prevent the same questions being asked over and over from numerous parties. The plan was to sort it out between us, sweep it all under the carpet, then mention it to those who may want to know the details once it's all done and dusted. Unfortunately we live in the days of the internet and things cropped up earlier than planned. On the bright side, I can tell whoever reads this blog earlier than I planned to. 

Whilst in Austin, Texas, Evan got a little worse for wear. How was I aware of this? He would position himself at a table next to a dustbin to spit into as water would occasionally fill his mouth involuntarily. Evan needed to go back to the car. Meanwhile, I had the taste, I was ready for the night out. 

"Evan, are you ok?"

Austin Early In The Evening

"I need to go back."

"I'll walk you."

"No, no. You stay and have fun."

"Do you even know where the car is?"

"Yeah, it's just round the corner."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, don't worry about it. I might be drunk, but I know my way around."

"Promise me that you're ok to go back alone."

"Promise." 

And that was it, Evan disappeared back to the car to sleep it off via a trip to the pizza shop, whilst I drank with the locals, who didn't actually seem to be drinking I noticed. At kicking out time the streets were heaving with people posing, chatting, or hooking up. In amongst all of these was a single English lad asking whoever would listen where I could get another beer from. Most thought I was faking an accent and told me to go away in a rather impolite fashion. Finally giving up in the attempt to find more beer I headed back to the car. No Evan. I ring his mobile, no answer. I notice however, that the boots he was wearing are in the car. He definitely made it back, but for some reason left. I continued to ring his phone but nothing.

I wait for half an hour or so before heading out back into the centre in search. I must have walked down every back alley in Austin looking for a black and blue version of Evan. I was also aware that numerous times, I would be followed by two gentlemen as I walked down a shifty dark alley alone. I also believe that someone tried to pick me up thinking I was a rent boy as a large truck pulled up alongside me asking if I'm ok or something along those lines. As I carried on walking I heard a shout,

"Hey White Boy!" Now this particular weekend, there weren't many white people, let alone at stupid o'clock in the morning. I turn around.

"You better run, the police are following you."

"Me? Why?"

"You just Jaywalked."

Turns out that you can't cross a level crossing when the sign says no even when there isn't a car within a square mile. As I walked, the Police disappeared. I must have a sober walk.

Evan's Official Mugshot

Now at this time in the night/morning the streets are littered with homeless begging and sleeping in the streets. Unfortunately I have no sense of direction and would have to revert to the local bums for directions, always at a price. After feeling confident that I'd covered a section of town, I would get a personal guide back to the car park we were stationed to see if Evan had returned. He hadn't. Off out I go again to cover another section. Same result, no Evan, same result, paid escort back to the car, same result, no Evan. I continued to call his phone but still no answer. As my battery died I tried to find a payphone, to find out that America doesn't do pay phones. I asked a local policeman where the nearest pay phone was, just for another homeless man to volunteer his services to take me, the policeman told me to go with him. The phone didn't work. I must have paid a small fortune to the homeless people of Austin for directions that night.

Returning to the car with the worst chaffing, and blisters on my feet I sit next to the car and fall asleep for an hour or so. Still no Evan. Underneath the car park is a little convenience store, I walked in and asked if it was possible to borrow a phone charger and explained my story. The man, Elmer, and his friend whose name escapes me, were more than helpful. They offered me water, offered me food, let me use his phone to call the police stations, hospitals to see if he was there. Same result, no Evan. I waited whilst talking to Elmer who was originally from Pennsylvania but his father was in the forces so he moved around as a kid and loved Austin that much that he stayed. He asked about my history and when I told him I used to be a Cabinet Maker, he replied, "Ooooh you must be very good with your hands then?" The way he said this made me a little uncomfortable as it was obvious that he was gay. 

With my phone partially charged I thank him and leave to try and search for him again, limping in my new cowboy boots due to all the blisters. Realising that he can't go anywhere without his car I return to find him reading a note I left on the window wiper. 

"Where the hell have you been?" I shout,

"Where have I been? Where have I been? I've been locked up with Green Mile that's where I've been."

"What?"

"I spent the night in the cells with a big black man the police called Green Mile."

Green Mile Reference

"What did you do?"

"Nothing, they woke me up in the car, talked to me for half an hour or so, admired my knife, told me to put my shoes on which I did balancing on one foot, then cuffed me and put me in the back of their car."

"On what grounds?"

"Public intoxication, apparently they don't need to do a sobriety test in Texas, a girl was locked up for petting a police horse. Then again, I slept on my pizza and they thought the stain was sick."

"Who's Green Mile?"

"Oooh, a big black guy who was going crazy. They had to lock him up properly, we were just in a waiting room really. The police just kept shouting, Green Mile, shut the hell up."

"What's the result?"

"I have a court case on Wednesday." (today is easter sunday by the way)

As we get in the car and leave we wonder how much our ticket is going to be as we had been there over 24 hours. Luckily a group of girls waiting for a friend had an automatic pass that they used to let us through for free. Silver clouds and all that. When I took my boots off, it looked like I had an additional toe due to the size of the blister on the inside of my little toe. I asked Evan if his rear was ok after a night with Green Mile. Apparently, despite not being used, he thinks that because Green Mile sat next to him, the others thought that he was his property so left him alone. That and a Mexican kid was bleeding all over the floor next to him. 

After staying at his Aunt and Uncles for a couple of days in Dallas, we returned to Austin for Evan's court case. Turns out they could have transferred it to a Connecticut court, just to rub salt in the wound. The result, a fine, an online alcohol abuse course, and so many hours community service. All for sleeping in a car with the door propped because it was too hot and a nosey security guard that rang the police.

Back To Boston

With little time before my stint here is over, an invite back to Bentley University in Boston was just what the doctor ordered. However, without Hongi, Stef, or Erik, the duty fell upon Evan to join me for a weekend of fun and frolics.

Evan's Got A Balloon Too, Erik.

Arriving on the friday a little later than planned, we quickly dressed cowboy style and headed to the pub nearby so the girls could sing a little karaoke. Sooner you than me love. The problem was, not only were we in a big northern city dressed as cowboys, but the Boston Red Sox were playing Texas on the T.V. When I say playing, they were getting beat 7-0; not the best time to cowboy up. It also didn't help that everyone in the pub was small. Evan and I could stand at opposite ends of the pub and see each other clear as day, even without the hats. He even put a piece of straw in his mouth for the entirety of the trip. He's slowly becoming more and more redneck.

Arriving back to the room we noticed that Taylor, one of the girls, had recently celebrated her birthday and a stray balloon had avoided being popped. Now the last time Erik came here with Stef, he Skyped Evan and I drunk alerting us to the fact that he had found a balloon, yet couldn't pull it down into camera shot. His drunk grip too weak to pull it down long enough. We instantly sent pictures of this balloon off to Erik.

Much Better Community Atmosphere At Bentley

The day after we relaxed on campus, playing Kan Jam. This is a frisbee game where you have to land the frisbee in the opposite can either on your own or with help from your partner standing beside it. If you get the frisbee in the cut out slot you automatically win. Despite the love of frisbee at CCSU, I've never seen this game. At one time there was two games going on simultaneously. I never won a game.

What I loved about Bentley in comparison to CCSU was the atmosphere and community. On a weekend back at Central, the place is dead. Even on it's busiest of days the grass area, which is much bigger than that at Bentley, has half the people that I sat on the grass with here. They even have a public BBQ grill at the side for people to use if they bring their own charcoal. Everything just seemed so much better, all this despite everyone being in the middle of finals.

After a night in downtown Boston, the girls, Evan and I went to the cinema to watch Iron Man 3. The Cinema was packed, I've not seen one so full in a long time. There was also loads of legroom despite the lack of headrest, but as with every American event that I've gone to, everyone had food. Luckily the volume was loud enough to blank out the sound of crunching and slurping.

With the girls in need to revise before their finals the following day, Evan and I made our way home thanking them for their hospitality. Margaret and Meaghan are looking forward to a holiday in the Bahamas before starting in the world of work. After watching them burn to a crisp sat in the Boston sun, I already sympathise with them sat in the Bahamas. That's a lie, I'm jealous of them.

Road Trip To Texas - Day 12 & 13

Travelling through Dallas we stopped at Evan's Auntie and Uncle's for a couple of nights in a town called Frisco. The houses here are absolutely stunning and it was lovely to sleep in a proper bed after the car and cheap motels. After unpacking and showering we sat down for tea, a good home cooked meal of smoked pork and corn beef. I couldn't have felt more welcome if they tried as I was supplied with beer and margaritas whilst we all played a rude version of Apples to Apples, a card game.

We Really Need These Places
In England

The morning after, Evan's cousins Chris and JJ took us to Redneck Heaven for lunch. This place is similar to Hooters but a little more risque, the best description is that the waitresses are using it as a stepping stone to working in a strip club. The food is cheap in big quantities and the beer is cheap so all is well. Upon hearing that I'm English I had all the girls coming over to talk to me and tell me of their plans to kidnap me. I can think of worse kidnapping scenarios.

Wikipedia
When the Dallas area was being settled by American pioneers, many of the settlers traveled by wagon trains along the old Shawnee Trail. This trail was also used for cattle drives north from Austin. This trail later became the Preston Trail, and later, Preston Road. Preston Road is one of the oldest north-south roads in all of Texas. With all of this activity, the community of Lebanon was founded along this trail and granted a U.S. post office in 1860. In 1902, a line of the St. Louis-San Francisco Railway was being built through the area, and periodic watering holes were needed along the rails for the steam engines. The current settlement of Lebanon was on the Preston Ridge and was thus too high in elevation, so the watering hole was placed about four miles (6 km) to the west on lower ground. A community grew around this train stop. Residents of Lebanon actually moved their houses to the new community on logs. The new town was originally named Emerson, but that name was rejected by the U.S. Postal Service as being too similar to another town in Texas. In 1904, the residents chose Frisco City in honor of the St. Louis-San Francisco Railway on which the town was founded, later shortened to its present name.

The restaurant have different dress up days throughout the year, from naughty nurse, maids, school girl etc. Today was bikini day with bum cracks on display left, right, and centre. Apparently on 'clothes that aren't clothes' day there is a queue outside waiting for it to open and an average 2 hour waiting time to get a table throughout the day.

I Want To Be A Redneck If This Is What It's Like

Top Golf

After an entertaining lunch we went on to Top Golf. This is like a driving range but with a twist. Rather than just hitting it as far as you can or onto the greens, the flag is in the middle of a netted circle that is split up into sections. The golf ball has a chip inside it to track where it lands and if you get it in the netted circle you get points, the more points the closer you get to the flag. Despite having fun and a few beers, I still don't understand how golf is classed as a relaxing sport. The little white piece of crap won't go where I tell it to go, ever. There are multiple different games to play, from just hit it wherever you want, to the computer telling you which hole to aim for. 

On our return we were greeted with tortillas with pork and beef, Texan food is very good; although if you're a vegetarian they'll probably drag you out into the street and shoot you. After another good nights sleep we packed up, said our goodbyes, and started the long trip home. Due to lack of time and lack of money we couldn't see Memphis, Amish Town or anything in between but the later we will try to do before I come back to England.

By the time we got home we had driven 6228.1 miles and pushed the car over the 100000 miles mark. In my honest opinion the south of America is much better than the north. The people are very friendly and the way of life is very laid back. My favourite places are the majority of Tennessee and New Orleans (minus getting robbed). If I had to recommend America to anyone, I'd recommend the south. The only bad thing about travelling round the south is that I have picked up a liking for country music and as soon as I get a little workshop the first thing I'm going to make is a rocking chair.

Road Trip To Texas - Days 1 & 2

Full of childish excitement Evan and I packed up his dad's Hyundai and set off to pick up Hongi before setting off south. The plan was to set off on Thursday and drive overnight as to miss the traffic in and around New York, New Jersey, and DC. It didn't exactly go to plan as within 30 miles we were stuck in traffic, the only traffic jam in the whole trip. Not only were we stuck in traffic, but we were also heading in the wrong direction. Evan's idea to go it alone at the wheel instantly hitting a brick wall. This was when we added another companion to the trip, phoney. Phoney told us which turns to take and did so in a very eloquent voice. So we have an American (Evan), a German (Hongi), an Englishman (Me), and now a Korean (Samsung Phoney) in the car.

After pulling over in a car park in Manassas for the night we continued our journey. Silly me thought that because we were heading south there was no need for long trousers or a thick blanket. It was bloody freezing in that car with my thin little rag of a blanket. Not the best nights sleep I've ever had. Driving around the town on the way out was very picturesque and noticeably very clean.

Manassas Town Centre

Wikipedia

In July 1861, the First Battle of Manassas – also known as the First Battle of Bull Run – the first major land battle of the American Civil War, was fought near here. Manassas commemorated the 150th anniversary of First Battle of Manassas July 21–24, 2011. Second Battle of Manassas (or the Second Battle of Bull Run) was fought near here on August 28–30, 1862. At that time, Manassas Junction was little more than a railroad crossing, but a strategic one, with rails leading to Richmond, Virginia, Washington, D.C., and the Shenandoah Valley. Despite these two Confederate victories, Manassas Junction was in Union hands for most of the war. The crossroads grew into the town of Manassas following the war, incorporated in 1873. In 1892, it became the county seat of Prince William County, replacing Brentsville, Virginia. In 1975, Manassas became an independent city. In modern times, Manassas' development has been strongly influenced by its position as a suburb of Washington, D.C.

On Top Of The World

As we made our way further south we approached the Blue Ridge Mountains. Deciding to take the scenic route we paid the toll and made our way through the mountains at 35mph. The Blue Ridge Mountains are noted for their bluish color when seen from a distance. Trees put the "blue" in Blue Ridge, from the isoprene released into the atmosphere, thereby contributing to the characteristic haze on the mountains and their distinctive color. At first the mountains are stunning, although I bet that they are even more

Massive Icicles

 so when the trees and flowers are in bloom. For now the trees were bare and snow dusted the ground. With hundreds of viewpoints to stop at, it wasn't long until we started to pass the majority of them. There is only a certain amount of times you can look down into valleys of woodlands before you get a little bored. We decided to pull over and have a little walk down the footpath to find the waterfall labelled on the map. As we stepped out of the car the first sign of Evan's transformation into a redneck southerner came to the surface. Standing with straw in the mouth he noticed a skunk burrowing in the distance, his way of alerting Hongi and I was to mumble, "Dun lucka dat little mutha ---- ova there." I put gaps between the words now, but there was definitely no gaps when he said it, it was just one long word.

Man Conquers Nature

As we headed on down the path it was tricky to stay on our feet as the snow had turned to thick ice, pushing Hongi became a great source of entertainment. As we got closer to the waterfall the rocks around us had huge icicles dangling from them, I can't say I've ever seen bigger. I relived an old childhood tradition of snapping them and sucking it like an ice lolly. I didn't remember however how cold they are to hold, I must have been wearing mittens as a kid. Reaching the waterfall there is a big sign that alerts us to the fact that we shouldn't stray from the path nor should we walk on the rocks. This is the time where Evan decides that he can't read as he trots off jumping from rock to rock at the top of the waterfall to get a better look as Hongi and I made our way to the bottom. 

Heading off back on the road it became very monotonous as we traveled over 100 miles at 35 mph along the twisting turning road with nothing but leafless trees for company. Mr Sun tried his hardest to kill us all by making us fall asleep but despite gaining victory over Hongi and I, he couldn't break down Evan as we made our way to Asheville and the cheapest motel in the area; well according to the guy behind the desk but he would say that wouldn't he?

Preparing For Texas

Spring Break is upon us, they don't have the Easter Holidays here. The only thing that I struggle to understand is that the term 'Spring Break' implies that it is going to take part during Spring. Meanwhile the 'Easter Holidays' just imply that it is going to be held over Easter week.

As I write this, a mere four days before school closes, yet another snow storm has hit Connecticut. Apparently we are to get 6-8 inches over night and into tomorrow (Tuesday 19th). Things like snow on the ground does not imply that we are in Spring, if anything it tells me quite the opposite. As I walk across campus with snow and ice cold wind blowing in my face, this tells me that it is very much still winter despite the clocks going forward a week ago.

When I started to look for things to do for Spring Break I had images of American Teen films of huge outdoor parties by the beach, lake, or pool. When I started to ask the locals they simply turned and laughed at me. Connecticut doesn't allow anything like that in its state. They used to have pretty big parties at UCONN (University of Connecticut) but the police have called a halt to them due to the damage and destruction to the properties in the area. The next closest place is probably New Jersey but it is now becoming popular to travel to Florida for Spring Break.

Meanwhile, Evan and I have been watching 'King Of The Hill' and during a stupid conversation wondered if Alamo Beer (the beer Hank drinks) actually exists. A quick look online showed us that there is a brewery in San Antonio, Texas. I made a fleeting comment regarding how I'd love to travel to the south as I feel that it is more traditional America and I've heard about the Southern Hospitality etc. Evan looked at me and said very matter of fact that he has family in Dallas. A smile crossed our faces but nothing was mentioned further. As the months passed things were mentioned in passing and the idea slowly but surely became more and more real. The next thing we know, we've got a full route planned and a yearning to buy Cowboy Hats, Boots, and obscenely big Buckles. We set off on Thursday night with Hongi in tow sat in the back seat, travelling through:

Philadelphia, PA, Asheville, NC, Knoxville, TN, Nashville, TN, Huntsville, AL, Birmingham, AL, Montgomery, AL, Mobile, AL, New Orleans, LA, Baton Rouge, LA, Houston, TX, San Antonio, TX, Austin, TX, Dallas, TX, Oklahoma City, OK, Little Rock, AR, Memphis, TN, Sikeston, MO, Evansville, IN, Louisville, KY, Lexington, KY, Cincinnati, OH, Columbus, OH, Pittsburgh, PA, Lancaster, PA.


However, if we see a sign saying Worlds Biggest/America's Biggest we may have to take a detour.