The Bet

The month of February is upon us and I have made a pact to myself that very quickly turned into a bet with friends. After spending Christmas in Florida eating and drinking more than reasonable, I have alerted the media that I shall not touch a drop of alcohol over the month of February.

Unfortunately this was met with much laughter and disbelief from my peers here in America. They don't believe that this has been done involuntary back home in England due to lack of money and having to work. The reason for this pact is to one, save up money for Texas, and two, to help cut back on some of this American Timber that covers my English frame.

Show Me The Money!

I must admit that my friends do have a good enough reason to not believe as towards the end of last semester it was a common thing to hear from my lips. I'm not drinking until my birthday, I'm not drinking until Alejandra's birthday, I'm not drinking until December, I'm not drinking until next week, I'm not drinking until Erik's leaving do. All of which failed miserably for one reason or another.

As a bit of an incentive to complete the month I put forth a bet. If I win you pay me $10, If I fail I pay you $10. Jon was the first to take up the bet saying that it is easy money. Erik, all the way from Sweden said that it hilarious. Evan took up the bet, as did Ethan. Art is on the fence but believes that it can't be done. The Spanish girls have since changed their minds from laughing to backing me. I think they simply don't want to put money on it.

If I begin to post ramblings in the near future that don't make sense, that could indicate that the withdrawal symptoms have set in - wish me luck.

Tuesdays - Pick On Ethan Day

Before I Went To Work With
Permanent Marker.

It has recently occurred to Evan and I how much fun it is to pick on his roommate, Ethan. You'll remember last semester when I cooked at Hongi's house that Ethan passed out at the end of the night. At this point I picked up a permanent red marker and drew all over his face. Yes, this is a childish act but after a few beers it is very fun to do. He didn't notice until he went to the toilet hours later, and didn't manage to clean his face completely until a few days after that.

For Every Tin He Buys, We Have A
Set Of Stickers Available

This semester Evan and I found some stickers that say 'Tobacco is a drug too' and 'Kiss me, I don't smoke'. Ethan doesn't smoke but he does have numerous tins of chewing tobacco, all of which are a perfect size for these stickers to go onto. 

On Tuesdays, Ethan has lessons until 9.55pm. This leaves Evan and I time to stick things all over his side of the room. The first day we found dozens of A4 sized yellow work out forms. Ethan is part of the Air Force and plans to bulk up this semester after losing weight over Christmas. 

The second Tuesday, Evan and I used up our printing credits to print pictures of really ugly people and decided to stick them all over his things. His vitamin box, bulk powder lids, laptop, chair, alarm clock, pin board, and clothing box. When finished Evan sent Ethan a text:

We Covered Up His Favourite Pin Up Girl With The
Girls Basketball Team, Hardly The Same Is It?

9 ugly people are here to play,

9 ugly people are here to stay,

9 ugly people are in your room,

9 ugly people to lift you from your gloom.

Part of the fun is telling him that there are more things around than what we have actually stuck up. Unlike a normal person who would ignore it and come across them in time, Ethan can't relax until he finds them. Watching him route around his room looking for things that aren't there is very entertaining. 

 All we need to think of now is, what to do next week?

New Year - New Football Season

At the back end of 2012, I had been persuaded by Jon to go and take part in CCSU's Soccer Club. I initially didn't want to go due to the poor standard I experienced during the inter-mural league, and expected the same here. Apparently the ex-captain of the College team (now graduated) is managing the club and Jon is his coach as they played together in the past, and they were in need of a defender who knows how to play the position. 

Only One Nutter In T-Shirt & Shorts

I turn up in trainers, shorts, and t-shirt to looks of shock and horror as everyone else was dressed as if they were about to go on an expedition to the arctic. The fact that I didn't have any moulded boots for the fake turf resulted in comments of, 'you won't be able to stand up in those, you'll be sliding everywhere.' 

Shooting Practice - Not A Specialty Of Mine

As per training back home, we started with some light stretches and a jog. By the time the jog was over with I was plenty warm, regretting that I wore long shorts rather than normal ones; meanwhile the rest of the team were still complaining about the cold. We then got into teams and did the old 'run to cone A, back, cone B, back, etc.' My team back home call me a poor asthmatic slug due to my slow speed and even worse acceleration. Here this was emphasised by the fact that I couldn't get any grip by wearing trainers. Then onto ball work, running and taking it around the cones, turning and doing the same on the return; again, not something I've ever been particularly good at. As a centre half, if I ever tried to go around someone back home the manager would have my guts for garters. Get rid of the damn thing, if it's in the opposition's half they can't score. The funny thing was, another of the coaches was watching me and asked Jon what this idiot is doing here? 

On to passing which I surprised myself with. Due to the surface the ball is not going to bobble over your foot, or onto the wrong part of your foot at the last minute. Therefore I was able to control and pass the ball a lot better than back home on the weird and wonderful pitches that I've been exposed to. I couldn't really say the same for everyone else. After completing numerous little possession games we moved onto a full sized 11v11 game. The first thing I noticed was that communication is minimal at best, and although this was my first session, it wasn't everyone else's. I also noticed that no one likes to play in midfield; when the opposition broke they walked straight through where our midfield should be. It wasn't long until they got a rollocking from the defence (me); didn't seem to work though. Heading is an art that America is yet to master, as is tackling which made me stand out as I ducked to head a ball which the opposition attempted to control with his foot. 

Why We Couldn't Use The Real Football Pitch Rather Than
American Football Is Beyond Me.

Since the New Year, the team has been cut down to a reasonable number and training has begun indoors playing 5-a-side. Again, no-one wants to chase the ball back or mark their man. No-one passes the ball backwards preferring to take on 2 men and lose it to the 3rd. Apparently that is better to do than a simple 5 yard pass, who knew? When in possession in front of my own goal, everyone will run up field (we're playing on a tennis court) and want me to masterfully knock the ball over and around everyone so that it can land precisely at my team's feet. If I could do that I don't think I'd be playing amateur football. 

With more and more practices on the horizon and the potential of playing other Universities in the near future, hopefully I can teach those here how to play the game like an Englishman! 

P.S. I was nicknamed Crouchy on the first day!

First Week Back

A week into the new semester and things are going well although being re-introduced to the gym and the exercise bike was not the best in the world. Four week laying around in the sun with a beer in hand and now I'm waking up in agony and struggling to walk up stairs. I hate that bike. Back to chocolate milk and bananas. Oh, I have yet to find a banana milkshake in America, also they don't have prawn cocktail crisps!

Proper Snow, Unlike Home

The Spanish girls are not too happy with the weather here as 3-4 inches of snow cover the university. I do have to give it to the Americans though, they don't panic when the snow hits and manage to get things ship shape in no time. The University closed until 10.40am; you don't get a snow day, just a morning whilst they sort out the paths and roads. Much better than England when there are wet leaves on the rails or a millimetre of snow and everyone panics.

Lessons seem to be ok so far, my broadcast tutor is a weatherman on the local T.V. and my play writing tutor is an actual play write which is apparently rare to have in a teacher, either that or she's just bigging herself up. For magazine writing we have to subscribe to a magazine of our choice, with no sign of Nuts, FHM, Score, or Furniture & Cabinet Making, I'm a little stuck as to which mag to go for. Evan and I are going to a big book/magazine store to have a gander over the weekend.

25 Year Old Paperboy

I was introduced to Mohammed on opening day to find that he is a senior who no longer wants to drive to and from University everyday. He is an Iraqi refugee and moved here three years ago not speaking a word of English, however speaking to him you would never have guessed. I'd still be talking like Manuel from Faulty Towers a decade after moving to a new country.

I thought I had got myself a job as a paperboy after being told at the interview to keep an eye on my email as they want to get me signed up as soon as possible. I then received an email saying that the job had gone elsewhere. Why tell someone they have got the job just to tell them it has gone to a friend of theirs no doubt? 

Intro To Semester 2

After our flight back to Connecticut and saying goodbye to Stefanie before she flew back to Germany, I stayed at Jon's house for a couple of days as I couldn't move back into my dorm. Luckily, whilst doing a couple of jobs on campus, I bumped into the Resident Director who said that if I wanted to I could move back into my room early. 

As I got to my floor I noticed that it was the cleanest it had ever smelt, no signs of leftover pizza or weed at all. I got to my door and found new name tags and that my roommate for this semester is a guy called Mohammed, fingers crossed that all will be OK  Upon opening the door it was like walking into a furnace despite the low temperature outside. The room had a weird smell to it which I put down to dust on a red hot radiator. Because I was allowed to leave my things in my room, it hadn't been cleaned like the other rooms. The amount of dust under the beds and on the surfaces was quite disgusting. It feels quite weird being back as apart from the Resident Assistants, I am the only one here. Then again because of this the bathroom is empty and pretty clean.

As people are not meant to be here the canteen is not yet open. That means that for tea I had a baguette and a family bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos. Yum!

Hopefully this semester will be just as good, if not better than the last.

Fort Lauderdale & Last Goodbyes

Me & The Number 1 Swede On The Way To Cape Cod
In September.

With only a couple of days left until we have to depart the luxury of Florida and home cooked meals, Jon and I took a trip down the coast to Fort Lauderdale. Not only is it a wonderful place to visit, but we had some unfinished business to take care of. Erik was staying there and unless we popped down to see him, we wouldn't get a chance to say goodbye before he went back to Sweden.  The funny thing is that Ice Hockey is big in Sweden and Erik wanted to see an NHL game whilst here, but the season has been in lockout since he arrived. It has just been announced that those in charge have come to an agreement with the teams so that it will start again this month, just as Erik's going home. 

Despite being a great guy, Erik is a pain in the backside when it comes to texting. His English is perfect, written and spoken, yet for some strange reason this all seems to go down the drain once on his phone. I'm not sure if it is because he forgets to change the auto correct from Swedish to English, or if he does it to annoy me, but it proves problematic; especially when you're trying to arrange plans. 

They Are Possible To Miss - Trust Me.

After long texts the previous night we got an address out of him and waited outside the hotel. It turns out that the address he gave us wasn't his address. The funny thing was that when we said we were outside, he said that he couldn't see us. No bloody wonder when you deliberately gave us the wrong address so we would be nearer the beach. Anyway, he told us to walk along the sea front until we came to two big plastic fish; my turn to be stupid now. We walked for a long time before deciding to get something to eat, I told him that I couldn't find the fish and that we were in such a restaurant. When he arrived he pointed out the fish right outside the window I was sat next to. 

It turns out that he has had a mixed three weeks in Florida. Having spent most of his time on the west coast of the state, the weather wasn't as good as what we have had here in West Palm. He was happy to see his girlfriend, albeit for a short time before she boarded a cruise with her parents (one he was meant to go on but his visa wouldn't allow him back in the country). He then diagnosed himself with a strain of Man-flu and prescribed himself time in bed.

Erik & I Rafting In Massachusetts 

Travelling around with Hongi, Stef, and another German in a rented car he feared for his life whenever Stef got behind the wheel. I've never traveled with her so can't personally comment, but it became a joke once she smashed into the back of a car when checking her blind spot for far too long. 

After we ate we spent some time on the beach. The beaches here are lovely yet we found ourselves in the gay part of the beach; great choice there Erik. Once the sun began to set we did a little pub crawl and found out that Fort Lauderdale would be a great place to have stayed. Lots of pubs and clubs, beautiful beaches, great atmosphere; similar to Miami but with less money. 

For Some Reason, Beaches In America Aren't Crowded Like
Any Other I've Been To.

We went to Hooters for tea but felt short changed when we were stuck behind a pillar blocking our view, and then served by a guy. Not happy. At 8.30, Jon and I said our goodbyes to Erik promising to meet up again in the future, whether it be in England, Sweden, or mainland Europe.

The problem that now faced, Jon and I was that there is no public transport to speak of to get us back to West Palm, the pubs were starting to get lively, and there were sun loungers on the beach. Trying our hardest to avoid the pubs we walked up and down the strip before being told of a deal '$10 to drink as much draft beer as you want from 9pm-4am' Now to us this sounded like a scam so we walked on, but then we came across another promoter selling the same deal. We couldn't resist the idea of this twice in a short space of time so we went and had a look finding out that it was in fact a real deal, not a scam. 

Some Memories Are Best Left Forgotten.

We walked in and it was a little dead but we didn't mind, we thought it would pick up. The problem was it didn't. There was meant to be a Beer Pong Tournament starting at 9pm but the owner wanted 20 teams, and so waited for the magic number. It never came, in fact people got annoyed waiting and left leaving me, Jon, and a couple of other lads as the only people in this massive pub/club. That was when the live entertainment came on, a rapper and a DJ who claimed that they don't care if they play in front of 2 or 200 people as this time next year they'll be famous. After hearing them, I can't say I have the same faith in them as they had in themselves. Even the toilet attendant left early, although he was asleep earlier on in the night anyway.

Looking Studious Sat On The Steps
At Harvard

After putting in a fair enough shift and carrying each other out of the pub we decided it be best to try and get a taxi home. Now, I don't know if I missed something because the taxi man was Haitian and I couldn't understand a word he said, but I said if he would do it for $80 off the clock to which he agreed; or so it seemed. When we set off I noticed the clock was on but thought nothing of it, I'm drunk and can't understand what he's saying anyway. When we finally arrived he charged us $98, now I fail to see how $80 off the clock became $98 on it? Jon said he cut a decent chunk off what it should have cost and I was too tired and lazy to argue. If the taxi drivers here are like home, you're never going to win.

For our final trip out in Florida it was good to see Erik and I wish him all the best back home in Sweden. CCSU just won't be the same without people thinking we're brothers, related, or simply getting the two of us mixed up. All the best mate. 

Butterfly World

Brenda is currently doing a course at a Boston University that it based around art (I think) therefore she always has a camera in hand taking pictures. As this is also a passion she goes out of her way to find nice shots, so today we went to the Butterfly World.

This Little Bugger Was Hiding
In The Treetops

Flying The Blue & White Flag

Here there is a laboratory, a butterfly aviary, garden and butterfly emerging area, tropical rainforest, grace gardens, bird aviary, English rose garden, and lorikeet encounter. As we walked in it really is beautiful as the butterflies dance around you as you walk through the gardens. A wide range of colours and species surround you as you walk through but unfortunately I couldn't find a blue and white one, the closest being blue and black but I'd say that was more of an Inter Milan butterfly rather than Rovers. 

'Do It Like They Do On The Discovery Channel'

Caveman

After walking through the butterfly bit I was happy to see some parrots although they didn't want to speak to me; ignorant, ignorant indeed. When we went into the lorikeet bit you could feed them and have them land on your arms, shoulder, etc. Now despite being 25 years old, I found it more interesting watching a couple do it Discovery Channel style on one of the beams. 

How Many Butterflies Can You See?

How Do You Make Flowers Prettier?
Stick A Numpty In Front Of Them

 I was quite disappointed with the flowers, mainly the English rose garden as there weren't very many in bloom despite the nice weather. It looked as if the majority were dead as if they were at the end of the season. That and there weren't even a Lancashire Rose, nor Yorkshire. Disgraceful.

Fishing

After spending New Years Day the English way, being hungover and watching the Darts Final at the 'Ally Pally' it was back to exploring Florida. Jon's Grandparents are big fishers and managed to get us on a boat to try it out. Jon and Brenda aren't the biggest fans of fishing but I thought I'd give it a go. It's hardly as if I'm doing it like they do back home. Up to your waist in freezing cold water whilst wearing waders in the wind and rain.

That Boat Screams 'You're Going To Be Sick'

As we got to the boat the first thing that I saw was a vision of me as a child throwing up everywhere when I was in Tenerife whilst going out to see the whales and dolphins. As more and more people got onto the boat, and I realised how close together we were going to be, I prayed that I wouldn't cover everyone in the turkey sandwiches I had for breakfast. 

As we boarded we picked up our rods and picked a spot. Jon's Grandma ordered us to the back of the boat as apparently you get better luck there. Sounds stupid but I am one of those people that use the same urinal before every Rovers game. The boat set off and things seemed fine; I'll admit that I'm not the biggest fan of boats but my stomach was fine. Equipped with camera for a picture of my catch, or a picture of my projectile vomit, either would provide entertainment.

Not A Bad View Though

We finally stopped off and dropped our lines in to drift away in hope of catching something. When the guy on board hooked up my bait with a mackerel (something I would have been happy catching) I realised that there were bigger fish to be caught. As I waited seagulls followed suit and ended up thinking I was a toilet. Apparently in America it is good luck to be pooed on by a seagull anywhere on your body. In England we're a little bit more particular as it must be on one of your shoulders, can't remember which. Hopefully as I'm in America, it would give me luck and help me land something big. 

Feeling Fine, Surprisingly

Time marched on, 4 hours in fact marched on, and my line remained unbitten. The only time I got a little excited was when it got caught on a lobster trap, other than that I just started to feel more and more unwell. Not to the point of being in danger of sharing my breakfast, but enough to make sure I didn't look anywhere but the horizon or my rod as I prayed for the boat to kick up and move again. I only felt bad when we were stationary as the boat didn't rock when the motor kicked in. 

Out of the four of us, only Jon's Grandma caught anything but had to throw it back because it was a little too big. I guess fishing isn't my sport.

Happy New Year

A Rare Trip To The Dancefloor

Should Really Put My Drink Down

I am pleased to say that I didn't spend yet another New Years Eve traipsing the streets of Clitheroe in the ice and wind going to the same old places before standing under the clock tower freezing my little fellas off. This year I spent it in West Palm and was more than comfortable in a thin short sleeved shirt. Unlucky England.

In an attempt to save money, Jon, Brenda, and I did things American style and started the evening off drinking shots in the kitchen. Half a bottle of Sambuca to myself later and we were ready to party. The main street of the city was set up better than anything home can be bothered doing. The street was fenced off from traffic with lights hanging above the road and lighting the pavements as party goers made their way from pub to pub. 

You've Got To Have A New Years Hat

Why Do Australians Insist
On That Hand Symbol?

We started off in this nice little place where they happened to serve a nice, refreshing pint of Strongbow; job done. Once the place began to get a little busier we left and queued up to go the the rooftop club above the pub we were just in. This is the first time I've ever seen a lift in a club, in England it would be full of sick, urine, and who knows what else. On top of the building there were two giant dancefloors with big screens on the back walls, three bars, and a fantastic view of the city. That wasn't even the best bit, the measures they gave on cocktails were enough to put a smile on an alky's face.

A Brother's Duty To Hold His Sister's Cardigan

The Blind Leading The Blind

As the night progressed things became a little hazy, with more alcohol being consumed and being told by numerous people that my English accent is fake? Funny thing is if I was to put it on, I'd do a much better job than my regular accent. 

After watching numerous American films and T.V programs I was expecting a big fuss over the countdown with party poppers and balloons at midnight. Turns out I was either in the toilet at the time or they just didn't bother - how odd!